Italy has a "free" health care system. I say "free" because in my pregnancy experience not everything has been free (some exams and blood tests-but still, if you go public the most you would spend on an entire pregnancy couldn't be more than 500 dollars), but it still beats the US.
A friend of a friend recently traveled to the US, and was 2 months pregnant when she left. She got the go-ahead from her general doctor AND her OBGYN to travel and off she went. A few days into her trip, she started hemorrhaging. She is now stuck in America, in a hospital, until she delivers (another 7 months!) with her medical bills piling up, since she has no health insurance in the US. If the situation were reversed, any American (or any nationality) in an emergency would be able to have free health care. But this being said, it does not mean that the Italian public health care system doesn't leave a lot to be desired.
The health care system here is great when you are diagnosed with a serious disease, for instance. You will get all the treatment you need for free. However, true in form as a country full of self-contradiction, screening, yearly check-ups, prevention, and early diagnosis are unheard of here. And almost everyone I have heard of being diagnosed with cancer, died because they discovered it far too late (in fact a quick search by me on the world wide web found that Italy is ranked number 2 in the world for countries with the highest deaths per diagnosis of cancer). The expert that I am, I would deduce that this is at least in some part due to the fact that most middle class Italians wouldn't dream of going through the public system for something as useless as an annual checkup, as it would entail taking a full day off of work, standing in line at the public health care office for possibly hours just to make an appointment with a specialist. Additionally, public health care doctors have a reputation (whether merited or not I really don't know) for being below par when compared to private doctors. However, (another contradiction) public HOSPITALS are regarded as better equipped and medically trained than the better organized and more convenient private hospital 'clinics'.
I don't know why I have decided to blog about this. I guess because I am running around trying to find out how to not pay 200 euros for certain pre-delivery exams and it is driving me crazy. Here, doctor offices do not take blood or cultures or anything else. You have to do everything separately in different offices, and then bring the results to them to be analyzed. How would I do this if I had a job? I would probably just do everything privately in a private hospital, because I wouldn't have a choice. Just taking the days off of work to run through this bureaucratic circus would be the means to justify paying for the convenience of a private hospital.
Bottom line is, thank God I am in a country that at least offers me the option, headache or not, to have free health care.
Thursday, September 30, 2010
Monday, September 27, 2010
33 weeks!!!!
33 weeks!
This means I have 49 days until my due date (only 5 percent of women ever deliver on their due date) and 4 weeks until I am full term (baby is fully developed/prepared/ready and could come any day).
I feel pretty ready emotionally. I had a little emotional break down a couple of days ago, and then put my emotions behind me and am looking forward to these last few weeks before baby. It is just so hard going through these changes so far away from home, my family, friends, my language, my culture, my preconceived notions of pregnancy care, etc. I have concluded that the stresses of bi-cultural relationships are only more apparent when preparing for a baby and creating the foundations for a family, making life especially more difficult for the foreigner in the relationship. I miss home more, I miss my family more, etc. Add that to the fact that my hormones are all over the place...it's just been tuff. But I finally feel in a good place and am emotionally ready.
Full steam ahead!!
Thursday, September 23, 2010
Saturday, September 18, 2010
32 week round up
1. Weird Belly
Throughout my pregnancy, I have definitely noticed that I have a weird shaped belly. People tell me, pictures tell me, my gut instinct tells me. But I always thought, OK, maybe it's just because it is the beginning of the pregnancy, and with time it will fill out and I will have the perfect little round basketball other women have. But no, with only 8 weeks left, I still have a stomach that is clearly divided in two, between my uterus and stomach. Do you see it? It looks like my baby is trying to push himself out through my skin.
2. Hospital
I am giving birth on the Tiber Island in Rome. It is a very small island situated between Trastevere and the Jewish Ghetto, and very close to home! The island is very small, and contains the Fate Bene Fratelli hospital, a small church, and a few cafe's. The hospital is recognized as one of, if not the, best in Rome for maternal care and delivery. Historically, the island is associated as a place of healing as many plague and leper victims were quarantined to life on the island. There is a legend which says that after the fall of the hated tyrant Tarquinius Superbus (510 BC), the angry Romans threw his body into the Tiber. His body then settled onto the bottom where dirt and silt accumulated around it and eventually formed Tiber Island. Pretty interesting place to be born!
3. Lamaze
We have started Lamaze and parental preparation classes which we love! It is a time tog et together with other first-time-moms-to-be and ask questions and just feel more relaxed about everything that is coming to us. However, the last lesson was about the first signs of labor, when to go to the hospital, etc, and Gian and I started freaking out during class. I felt like I was having a panic attack and couldn't breathe. Gian kept looking at me and saying "Are you hot? I am so hot. Is it hot in here? I think they have the heat on." We calmed ourselves down, but I have to admit I am still terrified.
4. Sister and brother
My sister and brother-in-law were visiting for a couple of weeks, split between Rome and Avellino. My sister helped me to get ready for the baby and she threw me a wonderful baby shower, of which I have NO PICTURES! We showed Italians, Bulgarians, Mozambicans, and Brits what a baby shower is all about! Here is the new furniture she helped me pick out for baby Gabriel's clothes:
5. Growth sonogram
I scheduled my growth sonogram for when my sister was in town so that she could meet her nephew and godson. Everything went wonderfully and my baby is a big one! At 31 weeks, he was already 4.8 pounds and the doctor predicted a 8.8 baby by my delivery date. His head is already in position down under, pressing every day against my bladder, and since I am so tall, he has enough room to be "laying out like he is sun bathing" which is why I don't have a ball-shaped belly.
After what happened at the last sonogram, I asked my doctor to confirm AGAIN that it is indeed a boy, so she looked around for the penis. As she found it, I looked at Gian who mouthed to me "It's big!" Haha. Such a proud daddy.
I have gained 6 kilos so far, which is equivalent to 13 pounds. I feel really good about that! Hopefully I don't blow up these last few weeks...
Throughout my pregnancy, I have definitely noticed that I have a weird shaped belly. People tell me, pictures tell me, my gut instinct tells me. But I always thought, OK, maybe it's just because it is the beginning of the pregnancy, and with time it will fill out and I will have the perfect little round basketball other women have. But no, with only 8 weeks left, I still have a stomach that is clearly divided in two, between my uterus and stomach. Do you see it? It looks like my baby is trying to push himself out through my skin.
2. Hospital
I am giving birth on the Tiber Island in Rome. It is a very small island situated between Trastevere and the Jewish Ghetto, and very close to home! The island is very small, and contains the Fate Bene Fratelli hospital, a small church, and a few cafe's. The hospital is recognized as one of, if not the, best in Rome for maternal care and delivery. Historically, the island is associated as a place of healing as many plague and leper victims were quarantined to life on the island. There is a legend which says that after the fall of the hated tyrant Tarquinius Superbus (510 BC), the angry Romans threw his body into the Tiber. His body then settled onto the bottom where dirt and silt accumulated around it and eventually formed Tiber Island. Pretty interesting place to be born!
3. Lamaze
We have started Lamaze and parental preparation classes which we love! It is a time tog et together with other first-time-moms-to-be and ask questions and just feel more relaxed about everything that is coming to us. However, the last lesson was about the first signs of labor, when to go to the hospital, etc, and Gian and I started freaking out during class. I felt like I was having a panic attack and couldn't breathe. Gian kept looking at me and saying "Are you hot? I am so hot. Is it hot in here? I think they have the heat on." We calmed ourselves down, but I have to admit I am still terrified.
4. Sister and brother
My sister and brother-in-law were visiting for a couple of weeks, split between Rome and Avellino. My sister helped me to get ready for the baby and she threw me a wonderful baby shower, of which I have NO PICTURES! We showed Italians, Bulgarians, Mozambicans, and Brits what a baby shower is all about! Here is the new furniture she helped me pick out for baby Gabriel's clothes:
5. Growth sonogram
I scheduled my growth sonogram for when my sister was in town so that she could meet her nephew and godson. Everything went wonderfully and my baby is a big one! At 31 weeks, he was already 4.8 pounds and the doctor predicted a 8.8 baby by my delivery date. His head is already in position down under, pressing every day against my bladder, and since I am so tall, he has enough room to be "laying out like he is sun bathing" which is why I don't have a ball-shaped belly.
After what happened at the last sonogram, I asked my doctor to confirm AGAIN that it is indeed a boy, so she looked around for the penis. As she found it, I looked at Gian who mouthed to me "It's big!" Haha. Such a proud daddy.
I have gained 6 kilos so far, which is equivalent to 13 pounds. I feel really good about that! Hopefully I don't blow up these last few weeks...
Wednesday, September 8, 2010
Communication from beyond
For the past 3 nights I have had dreams of my baby. All are very detailed and each one deals with breast feeding. Specifically, forgetting to breastfeed my baby, leaving him with someone else and then remembering, rushing back to feed him but I can't find him and I wake up never having found him to ease his hunger. Only once did I successfully feed him. My whole life, my dreams have been very intense and detailed and often the feelings I have in them stay with me all day. I feel this sadness the rest of the morning that I wasn't able to meet my baby's needs.
What do these dreams mean? Is my baby telling me he doesn't trust me? Is he telling me to get more calcium? I am taking supplements and drinking at least a glass a day! I wish that dream reading was an exact science...
What do these dreams mean? Is my baby telling me he doesn't trust me? Is he telling me to get more calcium? I am taking supplements and drinking at least a glass a day! I wish that dream reading was an exact science...
Monday, September 6, 2010
30 weeks and so emotional
We are finally 30 weeks pregnant! I feel like I have been waiting for this milestone for forever. On the one hand I am so excited to meet our son, but on the other I just feel like I don't know what in the hell I am doing and I need to vent. How did my life change so much in 4 years? I met Gian, got engaged, got married (twice), bought a house, and got pregnant on the honeymoon. All happy changes, but still major life changes! The fact that Italy has become my home, and that I will forever live far from my family and best friends, has just recently been absorbed into my head. It all feels much more final, now. I mean, I always knew it was final, but the repercussions of it have just hit home. My dad had a heart attack a few weeks ago, and not being able to be there brought on guilt, insecurity and fear.
I think my feelings towards major life changes are further compounded by my utter sense of helplessness. Up until now, I have been swimming 500 metres a few times a week at the pool or in the sea, been capable of doing the laundry, dishes, food shopping, etc. But now, every little chore is a major stress on my body. I am so tired, my back is worn out, my legs hurt if I walk more than 20 minutes, I can't stand up for more than a couple of minutes, I need sturdy chairs with good backs at restaurants (which is not always a given in Italy!). Just doing the laundry, I need Gian's help because I can't bend over and pick up the clothes from the machine. And then I feel like this horrible, nagging wife because from the moment Gian walks in the door from his 10-hour work day, I am asking for help in some way to finish some banal task. He does everything with grace, but I know he is tired, too. He is the bread winner in the family and works so hard. I will be fine and happy and then all of my frustration will come to the surface and I take it out on Gian. Then I go through the guilt process of being mean and maybe a bit hurtful to Gian, a very patient and loving husband. It's a constant cycle.
This stresses me out even further when I fast forward 3-4 months and we have a newborn, we are both sleep deprived, and are completely lost in the delicacy and newness of having a very fragile human life in our responsibility! This is huge. Having a baby is a big deal! And to make matters worse, neither of us have family close by to help (although my mom is coming for 2 months in November). I just keep telling myself that all these fears are normal and bithcyness is caused by hormones (I keep telling Gian this, too) and hope that once I see my baby everything will click and fall into place. It does right? Am I a bad mother already?
I think my feelings towards major life changes are further compounded by my utter sense of helplessness. Up until now, I have been swimming 500 metres a few times a week at the pool or in the sea, been capable of doing the laundry, dishes, food shopping, etc. But now, every little chore is a major stress on my body. I am so tired, my back is worn out, my legs hurt if I walk more than 20 minutes, I can't stand up for more than a couple of minutes, I need sturdy chairs with good backs at restaurants (which is not always a given in Italy!). Just doing the laundry, I need Gian's help because I can't bend over and pick up the clothes from the machine. And then I feel like this horrible, nagging wife because from the moment Gian walks in the door from his 10-hour work day, I am asking for help in some way to finish some banal task. He does everything with grace, but I know he is tired, too. He is the bread winner in the family and works so hard. I will be fine and happy and then all of my frustration will come to the surface and I take it out on Gian. Then I go through the guilt process of being mean and maybe a bit hurtful to Gian, a very patient and loving husband. It's a constant cycle.
This stresses me out even further when I fast forward 3-4 months and we have a newborn, we are both sleep deprived, and are completely lost in the delicacy and newness of having a very fragile human life in our responsibility! This is huge. Having a baby is a big deal! And to make matters worse, neither of us have family close by to help (although my mom is coming for 2 months in November). I just keep telling myself that all these fears are normal and bithcyness is caused by hormones (I keep telling Gian this, too) and hope that once I see my baby everything will click and fall into place. It does right? Am I a bad mother already?
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